New Avengers 33

Oh, it’s super awesome, if you enjoy Doctor Doom and the Molecule Man bandying about ponderous Hickmanesque dialogue for page after page.  But at least it helps explain how Doctor Doom reached his apotheosis here at the cusp of Secret Wars… I mean, I assume it does, since it’s one of those comics that’s so dry my attention keeps wandering whenever I try to read it.  Molecule Man is a bomb scattered across realities.  Doctor Doom starts his own religion of Black Swans to counter the actions of the Beyonders… but not the Black Priests… and also something with the Mapmakers… anyway, it’s a whooooole lot of ground to cover just to get to the ultimate confrontation between Doom and the Beyonders, which, I admit, starts out pretty rad before it ends the same as every other Jonathan Hickman comic of late: blank space!

I just miss the Molecule Man of the Jim Shooter era of yore, in which he was just this average nerdy guy who, despite his god-like power of complete control over all molecules, just wanted to stay in, watch TV, and eat popcorn with his curvaceous lava-powered girlfriend, Volcana.  So when the Beyonder kept knockin’ on his door during the events of Secret Wars II, all wonderin’ what it means to be human, he was the one who kept quietly repairing the damage to the universe behind the Beyonder’s back.  Now he’s just standard-issue Jonathan Hickman crazy character.  Oh well!